What was on TV? Wed, May 11, 2005

20 years ago, America was gripped by the story of Jennifer Wilbanks, who ran away from her wedding and then pretended she'd been kidnapped. Let's see what was on TV.

8:00 Lost on ABC

1x22 "Born to Run" (record ANTM on UPN)

The Lost fandom learned to hate Kate episodes pretty quickly. Some of that was sexism, some of that was bad episodes ("Whatever the Case May Be" is a real turkey), and the writers' struggles to write for the character and for women in general.

But a lot of it was also the audience's hunger for answers. Kate has three episodes in season one, and we still don't learn what she did. And that mystery was established in the pilot! The writers were clearly stalling, and so it was easy for the audience to project all their frustration and anxieties about the many, many lingering questions Lost introduced onto Kate. And misogyny definitely greased the wheels.

I was frustrated when I first watched this episode. We still don't learn what Kate did, we just learn that the toy plane from the suitcase belonged to her childhood sweetheart? Who cares! But the episode plays a lot better on rewatch, when you aren't waiting to find out what Kate did. I think that the relationship with her childhood sweetheart (played by Sean Astin's brother and Patty Duke's son!) provides a lot of insight into her character. We see her attachment to him, but also that she almost ruins his marriage, gets him killed, and then runs away. It's dark stuff! And I love the scene with her mom, you think it's going to be a tender moment but then it all turns sour, like something out of a horror movie. Kudos to Beth Broderick, who makes a huge impact here.

9:00 Alias on ABC

4x19 "In Dreams..."

America really had torture on the brain in the mid-2000s. You didn't even have to watch the news, you just had to watch 24, or Battlestar Galactica, or Lost, or Alias. Seeing how each show approaches the topic is one of the most interesting things about this project.

Until now, torture has been something villains do on Alias. But tonight our heroes decide they need to torture Sloane's doppelganger (Joel Grey). And this is Alias, so the torture does not involve buckets of wire of tools from the hardware store, but rather hypnosis and buried trauma.

It works. We now know that torture didn't work in real life, but in the mid-2000s it usually worked on our TV shows. But when not-Sloane wakes up and recites his mundane army backstory and fails to even recognize Sydney, it's hard to feel good about what we've done. And then Joel Grey looks at our heroes with his steely eyes and asks them what they've done. 24 always made Jack Bauer feel bad about the torture, but never extended much sympathy to his victims. Here, we're asked to not only sympathize with this guy, but face his judgment.

10:00 America's Next Top Model (recorded)

4x11 "The Girl Who is Special"

It's episodes like this that make me ashamed to love Top Model. This one is infamous because contestant Keenyah is assaulted by a male model in their photoshoot. "Model" is actually generous; I'm pretty sure they found these boys on the street and used them because they were "exotic." These guys really did not know how to work a camera. You'd hope that the people running the photoshoot would display some professionalism and basic decency when working with inexperienced models. But alas. The guy gropes Keenyah, she tries to set boundaries in a gentle and joking way, he keeps going, she stands up for herself, and is admonished for her lack of professionalism on set and in judging.

And that's just the cherry on the shit sundae! The entire photoshoot is one giant testament to the show's poor judgment. The girls are tourists in Apartheid South Africa, and they're interacting with the sexy locals. The lack of taste is genuinely astonishing. And the fatshaming of Keenyah continues, this time with a horrifying side-by-side comparison. The show owes both Keenyah and any teen girl who watched this a personal apology and monetary compensation.

Then there is the matter of Nelson Mandela's cell. The girls get a tour of the prison where Mandela was held from a legit political activist, and then they get to step inside the cell itself. And ANTM is just not built for this. Keenyah and Naima (the two Black contestants) are profoundly moved, but Keenyah thinks that the biracial Naima isn't really that Black. Meanwhile, White girl Brittany thinks that Keenyah is making too big a deal about this and dismisses her experience. And even though Brittany goes home and Keenyah gets the best photo this week, the show still validates Brittany with the episode's title: "the girl who thinks she is special." There's fun drama and then there's jus plain old unpleasantness. This is the latter.

What Else Was On

• Anthony Fedorov, aka "Clay Aiken 2.0" went home on American Idol. Carrie Underwood's teary reaction to his departure inspired months of dating rumors. Since Idol, he has appeared as Link in Hairspray, Joseph in Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, Matt in The Fantasticks, the Prince in Cinderella, Roger in Rent, Rolf in The Sound of Music, and Enjorlas in Les Miserables. I hope regional theatres across America enjoyed a box office boost from Idol fans.
• Soon-to-be-cancelled Jack and Bobby aired its final episode. The guest star roster was insane: Lou Diamond Phillips as the titular brothers' dad, plus Tim Robbins, Norman Lear (!), and Gore Vidal (!!!!!).
• Special Sweeps Guest Stars: Michael Clarke Duncan on CSI: NY, Wayne Brady on Kevin Hill.

Late Night

"Did he tell you about the transvestite?" Seven words you never want to hear in a late-night interview from 2005.

But in his little late-night anecdote, Ryan Phillippe shades a cop being creepy about a trans person and harassing them for no reason. The trans woman seems like a cool chick with strong opinions about the film Studio 54. And Phillippe lets himself look ridiculous, this silly movie star who feels the need to defend Studio 54 to this stranger almost a decade after he shot the thing. Phillippe even uses all the pronouns before settling on female ones. I can't believe I'm saying this, but more people should have followed Ryan Phillippe's example.

And good lord. Conan O'Brien loved the movie Crash. Curious to see what he thinks of Brokeback Mountain come the fall. Already bracing for an uptick in gay jokes.

And Wanda Sykes is here! She does the impossible: tell a good joke about the Michael Jackson trial. She also predicts The Blind Side? One of the greats.

Music, 20 years ago

Here are Kermit and Pepe the King Prawn introducing Tori Amos on Craig Ferguson!